Worry

“Worry” was published in the October Hill Magazine, July 2022.

I was nervous
about the food running out
or the toilet paper
like so many
if I’m being honest
it was really the toilet paper
that worried me

I was worried about death too
death in a close, lonely room
without ventilation or view
or the warm hands
of my children
though it might be worse
to die in their sight

worry came back easily
like a well-worn sweater
for years I wore
worry as badge
my mother’s loyal son
until I trained my mind
by a thousand exhales

and a straight back
to understand that it was a choice
to hear the roar
of the waterfall
while still far enough upstream
to paddle to the safety of shore
and lay in soft grass

revel in the patter of crickets
even as the river gurgles
and swirls toward its fate
a choice to lay worry
at the edge of change
an offering of marigolds
a giving up on what is to come